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Here's another curious spin...How is it that Lenus and Meru can be accepted as dragoons at all, since they are Winglies? Dragoons (and dragoon spirits) were devices used against winglies during the Dragon Campaign. It seems a bit contradictory to now allow a Wingly to become a dragoon at all.
The dragoon spirit doesnt have to choose a human. I would say that the stone has no malice towards winglies. The main thing is, as I assume, the new weilder has to have traits similar to the original wielder. Damia was lonely, and Meru appears to fear being alone.